I have had a sort of online / phone relationship with a man who does a lot of traveling for his job. His job keeps him super busy as he is in the public eye (sorta) He asked me the other day to do something for him. I adore him so I was promised him I would. Well, I am not sure what happen but I completely forgot. I know this is no excuse. I felt so bad. Totally guilty for going against my word. I know he is disappointed in me. He doesn’t even want to punish me physically. He rather me feel this deep regret then to punish me so I feel better.
The truth is I would love for him to punish me. I need that release for the hell I am feeling right now. I have done what he has asked. It was at the top of my priority list today. I even apologized in an email to him. And now I hope this post will show him how sorry I am and will allow him to punish me so he will forgive my insensitive non act.
As a sub do you feel this way about your Master when you have done something wrong? Does it feel better to be punished?
Personal Note:
Please, I am begging for your forgiveness. I will do as you say and take what ever punishment you think I deserve. I need your attention to this matter.
wow you were a very bad girl.
ReplyDeleteHow do you do that begging thing, I'm no good at it.
ReplyDeletethis is a surprisingly sexy post.. =) maybe i should explore some more
ReplyDeletethanks for your comment, Carrie! i felt exactly the same way.
Aw, I hope it all works out quickly. *hugs*
ReplyDeleteYes, I often feel when I have messed up that I need the physical punishment. Master even pointed it out tonight saying "Half the torture of a spanking is waiting for it to happen" He had me blindfolded but I could sense every time he pulled back to smack my bottom again, but he would pause every now and then just to watch me flinch and tense up. He's right though, half the torture of the punishment is waiting for it, especially when you're not sure if it's coming or not. When it has been delivered at least you know you've been punished and can be forgiven, before that it's just waiting. And it's the waiting that kills me sometimes.
ReplyDelete