Friday, April 30, 2010


I am going to go off the beaten path a little bit today. So bare with me… Have you ever just watched another couple fuck each other? Just watch.., no sex between you and the others in the room. Do you like to watch your mate masturbate? Even a better question, do you like to be watched? Are you an exhibitionist?

My ex and I once went to a bar. And I met a woman there and asked her if she would come home with us and fuck him. That I just wanted her to be with him. She agreed. So we went back to the house and hopped in the hot tub. And she started to blow him. My god, I have never seen anyone give oral the way this woman did. She was like a Hoover vacuum. With the sounds and everything. Then she began to fuck him. She was so erotic, it turned me on beyond belief.

Then with the same ex a few months later he found a man online who would watch us fuck. We made him sit in a chair across the room. We allowed him to touch himself as he watched but no touching. It was hot! I loved being watched even more then me watching someone else. I love showing displays of affection. In the movies, at a restaurant, in the street. I love it when I am touching or kissing a older man too. The looks you get... turn me on.

Am I crazy? Do you all feel the same way?

I have a busy weekend planned. My daughter has a dance competition that lasts 3 days. She is such a beautiful dancer and I cant seem to get enough of watching her on stage. Have a good weekend yourselves. Talk on Monday…

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Extra Blerp

3 subs 1 Dom. For all you men out there this sounds like the perfect life. Two of them are married and one is single. They all know each other (even the husbands) and have been together several times.

I don’t know why I am writing about this. It has nothing to do with me but I just find this gentleman’s story so erotic and had to share.

My question about this is… Can a man really handle the needs of more than one woman? Or do you think it is just a sex thing and he doesn’t care about each of their needs? Visually, this seems like the ideal situation but is it?

I hope he will send me some pics to post here. Stay tuned…

Super Fun Friend

I have a friend who is such a man slut. He loves sex. No kink is too great…Last night he called me to tell me about his latest escapade. He can really tell a story. And this story had me going.

I got to wondering, if it is the sex that is so hot it keeps him going back for more, to push the boundary with himself and others or is it that he loves to tell the story? I am the only person he can tell. I love to listen and to hear about his experiences. (Although, some of the things he does is way beyond me)

Maybe I should suggest he start his own blog. To share his love for sex. To explore others out there with the same fetishes. What do you think? Are you the type of person that will try anything once? Is there to extreme when it comes to sex practices?

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Blog Extras

Does age play into the D/s lifestyle? It seems that a lot of women choose an older man to be her Dom. In my case I am 37 and Master C is 59. I love older men. I think it has to do with a certain level of success and that they know what they want in life and are living it. I love the dominance , love the experience, love the warmth and strength he gives off. Only age can provide these qualities.

Sometimes I get these little thoughts in my head and I just have to write them down. It is what I love about this blog. If I didn’t have this venue to write what I am thinking in the moment then I would have no one to discuss it with. Kinda sad I know… I want to welcome my new followers who came into the site yesterday. I love your comments and love your blogs. Thank you for sharing with me.

Now for my update on the Deadliest Catch. It is Wednesday and I just can not wait to discuss last night’s show with you. The premise of the show was about the 2 Jakes (greenhorns) switching boats. This is what I have to say about this…This was a great idea. I think they really could have made some great episodes about this. But knowing that Captain Phil dies in a couple of months, the show really put emphases on how much he loves his kids and how much he wants his son Jake to come back to his boat so he can spend more time with him. It takes out all the fun… Captain Phil used to be a hard ass to his kids and that is what made us love him so much.

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Open Marriage

I already posted today and it is unlike me to post twice in one day but I got to thinking… Last night I was watching HOUSE and it was about a couple who had an open marriage. So this was my thoughts about the subject.

As a sub I know that is it my Master’s right to be with other woman if he chooses to do so. He has the right to make me be with other men or woman if he chooses. He has the right to have a threesome or foursome or how ever many people. I am not married but if I were I have to accept that these are the rules and I understand that this is what I would have signed up for.

Now ask me how I feel about that. I suppose if I was not involved (meaning it was not a threesome or if I was watching) then I would feel hurt. That I would wonder what I was not doing to keep him from straying. I think it is only a natural response. But in the end… I know what was expected of me and know the rules before we had headed down that road of marriage that I would understand his need for verity. And hope that the honesty would only make our bond stronger.

What do you think?

Last Weekend

Did you all miss me? I know I didn’t post yesterday but that is because the weather knocked out power for several hours so we closed up the office and went home. I do not get to many days off where the kids are at school and I am home relaxing. My weekend was pretty good. Saturday the city where I live held there 50th annual Founder’s Day Festival. There was a parade, craft show, entertainment and fireworks at night. The kids had a great time. Sunday was slow. I had finished working on the house and my son and I hung out together at Burger King (he loves playing there) the park, then watched Avatar. His new favorite movie.

Friday night I got dressed up and Master C met me for dinner at a fundraiser being put on by the kid’s private school. It was dressy and a big auction took place. Not that I bought anything. But I ran into a guy I haven’t seen in 25 years. I was just a kid and I used to babysit his 3 young children. I think he was really surprised to see me. The last time I saw him was at his son’s funeral. I used to babysit once a week while the parents went to dinner or a movie. They had a 7 year old son, a 3 year old daughter and a 2 year old son. Anyway, one day the 2 year old got out of the house when the mother fell asleep and fell into the pool. He drowned. It was so sad…eventually the parents divorced and the father got remarried and had more children that turned out to go to the same school as my daughter. I have thought about that little boy all weekend. It’s strange how things turn out.

Friday, April 23, 2010

I was looking through some of my follower’s profiles and I came across this blog that said something really interesting. I saw my name come up and I was wondering if it was about me. If not then I apologize for quoting but if it is… GREAT! I like to know others are enjoying my writings. This is just a small part of what she wrote..

I am His. My body, my mind all of it. I will happily kneel before Him in a crowded room and do His biding. He has me reading Carrie's story, about a girls journey through this life. It's amazing, I love reading it. The training she receives is harsh. I am not sure I could handle a lot of it since I don't handle pain well, but I am curious and I want to try it. I get hot thinking about it. Odd, because when I first started this life, the idea of being smacked hard in the ass appalled me. turns me on.

Childhood Spanking

I was thinking back to my childhood last night. I was 10 and my brother was 9. We had been a pain in my parent’s ass all week. We knew we were pushing our luck. So one summer day my brother and I were fighting and nail polish remover was spilled all over the coffee table and left a huge bleach stain on it. Not being about to do anything about it we covered it up with some magazines. Later that day when my parents got home it didn’t take long for them to find the stain. I think this was one of the worse spankings I ever got from my father. He walked into the kitchen and pulled out a wooden spoon and beat my ass right there until he decided that I needed to be beat some more in my bedroom after he spanked my brother for a while.

I think hearing my brother being spanked by the spoon was worse then the actual spanking. All I kept thinking was I hope my father got tired and forgot about me waiting for him to walk into my room. I sat on the bed waiting in what seemed like forever and then again… not long enough. My door open, my fear was insane “Bend Over!” I got off the bed and bent over it. WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK....

My father, not saying another word, walked out of my room. I remember crying the rest of the night until I fell asleep.

Thursday, April 22, 2010


Submission... the word alone conjures up it's very definition. It defies imagination and instills a warmth within, a warmth in which too few find comfort. Submission, a warmth prepared to embrace ~ A solace waiting...

Perhaps in order to find understanding of submission we must first explore what it is not. Submission is not a weakness, not a character flaw. Submission is not involuntary servitude, nor is it a representation of a stature or place in society. Submission is not about being a doormat, nor about being a lesser person. Submission is none of these things.

I have come to believe that submission is an emotion, an inner feeling, a hunger satiated only by Dominance offered in love and commitment

Many call submission a gift in the context that submission is given to one who is deserving of it's receipt. Indeed, submission is a gift. The gift of submission is a gift of one's self, the inner essence of being, a complete and uncompromised emotional release flowing from the original possessor to the committed recipient. An emotion. A release. An offering. A tithing of pleasure passed from the living soul of one to the heart of another. Submission is warm, submission is soft, submission has no mass, has no weight and cannot be quantified, it can only be felt... just like an emotion.

Submission ... without it in My life, I am nothing ... with it, I am everything.

Always in Dominance and Forever with Love

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

The Deadliest Catch

I know all of you watched The Deadliest Catch last night…Right??? The race is on for the highest crab catch. And the Wizard is at the top with 90,000 lbs of crab so far. Witch leads me into the Catch fan club. I am a member of the shows fan club and I have been arguing my point that Captain Keith is a great Captain and has every right to be featured on The Deadliest Catch. Why are there so many haters of Keith? He is always on the top of the crab catch count every year… Well maybe that is the reason.

So for the record I adore Captain Keith. I am also in love with Edgar on the NorthWestern. Last night he was talking about leaving the crab fishing business so he can spend more time with his beautiful family. I will be heartbroken with this happens any time soon but I guess I can understand his reasonings.

So if you want to do me a favor become a fan on

And stick up for me about Keith and the Wizard. My member name is CRoche

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Blind Trust

When a sub is away from her Dom for long periods of time, can she truly trust his devotion to her? Should it matter? Should she even question it?

After speaking to follower Mark, he says it is all about the blind trust that a sub must have for her Dom. Even if his reasons or non-reasonings make no sense to you. A sub should just accept her place and trust that all his requests are in her best interests. A true Dom will always take care of his sub.

I had great seats...Bon Jovi was rockin.

Jon Rocking My World

Jon popped up right in front of us on a stage in the middle of the arena. He was singing this song to me =)

Monday, April 19, 2010

Jon Bon Jovi 2010

DANCING, SINGING, YELLING, JUMPING UP AND DOWN….Bon Jovi was the best concert I have ever been to. It was AWESOME!!! I had great seats…my pictures came out pretty good. The music was classic and the vibe was hot.

One of my followers, who is in the music business, gave me the tickets. And I thank him with all my heart for sending them my way. I do not get out of the house much, so being able to go out and have so much fun is worth its weight in gold. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU RB.

Friday, April 16, 2010

I was turned on by the suggestion of this website. I think it is very enlighting. Something to look at over the weekend. I would love to hear your comments. Have a good weekend...

Based on The Story of O, the erotic novel by Pauline Reage, is 4 days of reality porn -- real slave training, not staged. It is the real journey of truly submissive women who wish to become trained sexual slaves for men. To train these female slaves, Master trainer James Mogul uses everything from humiliation, bondage, whipping, spanking, caning and corporal punishment to female orgasm, cocksucking, pussy licking, hardcore fucking, anal sex, and even vaginal fisting. But at TheTrainingOfO, the primary means of training female sex slaves is psychology. Consensual erotic torture and domination increase each woman's submission, remolding her mind and attitude until she is an obedient sex slave.

The Training Of O is hardcore erotic humiliation and slave training, with bondage, sex and punishment along the way. The female slaves at are gagged, fucked and bound until they cum. Real female orgasms are just another way to increase a slave's submission. Photo galleries and high definition videos show the rope bondage, whipping, spanking, humiliation, training, psychological domination and finally the ecstasy of total submission.

Thursday, April 15, 2010


This post is kind of out there, even for me. I talk to several of the blog followers from time to time. This one gentleman had me thinking… Can a heterosexual male Dom enjoy sexual acts from a submissive male. He is not gay and has never done this before…He says it was the best blow job he has ever had. But in a way freaked him out.

What do you think? Women do this all the time. They are not gay but will have sexual relations with woman for fun or have a threesome with their male partner. Is there a double standard? Please tell me…leave me a comment or email me. I would love to know your thoughts.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

The Deadliest Catch

OK OK OK…This has got to be the best show ever. Last night was gripping, edge of your seat, exploding event this year.

I know most of you know that Captain Phil died a couple of months ago so seeing him on the tv last night was a bit creepy.

In the first moments of the show there was a fight between Jonathan and Keith. Why does everyone hate Keith so much. I just don’t get it but it does make for good TV…And I do think Jonathan is a hot head and someone needs to put him in his place.

They traded the 2 Joshes… Captain Phil’s son Jake and Captain Sig’s Jake switched boats for the king crab season. To cocky boys are about to see what it is like to work for other people. This should be good for everyone involved.

Then at the end of the show there was a boat that went down. It took less the 5 minutes for the boat to sink but luckily all 4 men were able to get into a life raft before they froze or drowned.
Well, that is my update on the show. I sure hope all of you become as big as a fan as I am…Even if you think it is kind of nerdy. But how can you not love the hard work, dedication, and sacrifice that these men go through.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

A Reminder

The Deadliest Catch is on tonight at 9pm. I hope all of you watch it so I can discuss it with you on the blog. I love this show and I love to share the passion of the show here. Tune in...check back with me
You fill me...with thoughts, desires, needs,

I never knew I had.."

You engulf my soul....
You take my body for your use...
You fill me...with thoughts, desires, and needs...
I never knew I had..
You make me let go
Let go of all I have known...
Give all I am to your desire..
You take my voice...
My mouth opens to speak..
And you claim it as your own..
Filling me with your tongue..
My eyes fill with unspent emotions...
Drawn to the surface by your safe hand..
Your gentlest caress...
Your harshest pain...
Releasing myself to you..
My mind, intelligent and strong...
My soul, kind and soft...
My body, beautiful, soft, kneeling
My spirit, open, flowing to you
You are indeed my Master...
You are the one, in whose care I am safe
Safe enough to be me...
You are the one, in whose care I find trust
Trusting you fully, with my thoughts and desires
You are the one, in whose care I find strength
Strength in my soul, my spirit, my body...

I am yours...

Monday, April 12, 2010

Punishment Is Near

Ok…I really did it this time. Master C is going to punish me harshly for breaking one of his very serious rules. You see, I have always shaved my pussy. I never liked too much hair down there. Anyway, a couple of months ago Master C asked me to stop shaving. That he liked hair. Lots of it. I agreed to keep it but I would really like to keep it well trimmed. That was not an option. I am not to shave.

Well, over the weekend I broke that rule. I just couldn’t help myself. It was driving me crazy. I knew it was wrong but a woman has to feel beautiful. That was my philosophy. Well, to my Master I don’t have much of a choice. So he has decided on my punishment. (1) I am not to have sex that will pleasure me. (2) He is going to come over and administer a harsh spanking everyday until the hair grows back. (3) I am to decide what he is to use on my ass. A paddle or his hand.

This is my question to you… The paddle is hard and after a while really stings. I have shed a tear over this paddle. Now Master C’s hand is horrible. He has no feeling in it from years of martial arts training when he was younger unfortunately, my ass still has plenty of feeling and I am unable to even hold still long. This is not an easy choice for me…Please help.

Friday, April 9, 2010

Friday's Fantasy

It's a quiet Sunday morning. We are lying in bed, at right angles, making love slowly, my legs raised so he can lay under them, he is on his side, his cock in my pussy, barely moving in and out, I am rubbing my clit gently, no rush. I feel his finger entering my pussy, now his finger is beside his cock inside me. It feels good, He fucks me slowly with both finger and cock for a while, I circle my clit, moaning quietly. Then he pulls his finger out slowly, covered in my wetness. His finger moves down to my asshole. Circling it, toying with it. There is plenty of wetness dribbling down from my cunt for lubrication. I allow his finger to explore my anus, putting some pressure on the clenched muscle, running his finger over the ridges of my anal opening, exploring, tantalizing me. Slowly his finger enters me. As his cock rocks in and out of my pussy, his finger has a matching rhythm. I feel myself getting wetter, I moan quietly, appreciatively. "I want to you fuck my ass", I ask, throatily. "Do it gently, just as you are now, babe." He withdraws his cock from my pussy and lets it slide down till the tip is touching my puckered hole. Slowly he pushes forward, until the head of his cock is spreading my anus wider, then stops to let me get used to him. "OK, I can take it, give me some more," I whisper quietly. I feel stretched as his cock enters me, my ass opening up to allow him entry. I feel it sliding through the tight muscle. There is no pain, I am relaxed, just a feeling of fullness. I reach down to touch his cock and measure how much is in me, I can still feel a couple of inches outside me. "All the way, please, I can take it." I feel him push into me, filling my ass with his cock, there is no space between us now, the base of his cock touches my bottom. We rock back and forth, slowly at first, then faster. "Your ass feels so tight, squeezing my cock", he says, "it feels so fantastic.” The feeling is incredible, the extreme fullness of his cock penetrating, the gentle rocking. I rub my clit while he fucks me. I am starting to come, and I tell him to speed up. He fucks me faster, giving me about eight inches of his manhood. He is such a good lover, taking care of me, taking care not to hurt me, just to give me pleasure, controlling himself so that I will come. He pulls his cock all the way out, then pushes it back inside my bottom quickly. Now he is fucking me fast and hard, his balls slapping against me as his cock hits bottom... "Come in my ass, please, I want to feel your hot spunck, come with me" I beg. As I begin to come, my body trembles and it is enough to bring him to orgasm, I feel him shoot his spunk inside my bottom, he gives me a few more strokes as he empties his balls inside me. We lay there, breathing hard, smiling at each other, my hand stroking his hair, his hands playing with my breasts, twirling my nipples. "Thanks for being such a great playmate, that was so fuckin' intense and satisfying”

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Crazy Fantasy

Things are slow in the sex department for me this past week. Master C has been busy and then became ill. So I sit here not being able to masturbate, totally sexually frustrated, with lots of fantasies in my head.

Last night I had day dream, right before I went to sleep. I am going to the Bon Jovi concert (really I am in just over a week) Anyway, I had a vision that I was at the concert with my man who was sitting next to me. I am wearing a skirt and flashy top. The people around us are dancing and singing…having a great time. I am standing up when I am pushed down on his lap with his cock pushed deep inside me. The feeling is great and the excitement of having public sex is incredible. The music is pounding and the people around us don’t seem to even notice what is going on. The sex is HOT…to unbelievable for this fantasy to come true.

Why are these images always coming into my head. IM LOVIN IT!!

Wednesday, April 7, 2010


Why is it I crave to live a disciplined life now, when the first 35 years I hated any kind of rules placed on me. In fact, when I got married I made sure that the word obey was taken out of my vows. I would argue until I got my way…

Now all I want is structure. To be totally submissive to my Dom. For him to be proud of me when I please him. And for me to gain reward for obeying his commands. And to understand that if a rule is broken that I will accept punishment.

All this talk is getting me excited. Have a good day

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Within the BDSM community, 24/7 relationships have long been considered an "ideal," and are a profound sexual fantasy for many if not most BDSM players. However, some BDSM community members may be deeply skeptical of their practicality.

Like all 24/7 relationships, vanilla or otherwise, the 24/7 D/s relationship requires a great commitment from both parties. Because D/s relationships are considered erotic or are thought to conform to the dynamics of "play," they are often not given the consideration or seriousness that people would give, for example, a vanilla 24/7 relationship like a marriage. In fact, 24/7 D/s relationships are a profound commitment and every bit as much a lifestyle choice as marriage.

That said… 24/7 D/s relationships are very real. This is a viable lifestyle choice for a growing number of people who find that their preferred relationship dynamics are best described in concrete, negotiated and in many cases absolute terms.

Monday, April 5, 2010

Im So Wet Today

Bent over, hands cuffed behind my back, being fucked from behind hard and fast. This is what gets my blood flowing. I love the power of Master C behind me. I need Master C’s attention and his affection.

I get this if I please him. I love when he tells me exactly what he wants and how to achieve his maximum pleasure. I can simply get off knowing he has gotten off because of me.

I am so horny this morning. I wish Master C would stop by and take me to lunch. Satisfy my hunger for him.

Friday, April 2, 2010

Happy Easter

Good Friday to all…that is if you didn’t have to work today, as I did. My boss is off and here I sit with not much to do because everyone else in my line of work is off too. OK just venting a little. LOL

Not much to talk about. I will be preparing for Sunday’s dinner with the family. The weather is supposed to be beautiful. Low 80’s and sunny. 11 more days until the Deadliest Catch starts with the opening of King Crab Season. (I know you all can’t wait) One of my favorite books has a movie coming out this weekend. I hope to see it. The Last Song (I know a chick flick but the book really touched me)

Have a wonderful weekend and I will see you all on Monday. KISS

Thursday, April 1, 2010

New Question

I love it when questions are brought to my attention. This is a good one… Once you realize that you are not vanilla can you ever go back?

For me the answer is no. Even the thought of going back to a “normal” sex life and “normal” relationship bores me. I have crossed over to the other side and even thou I have not tried all the kinky stuff out there; I do know that I can never go back. I have made the commitment to live my life a certain way in the hopes to find true happiness. And I’m getting there. I fight it at times but I want to make this work for me.

My blog has really opened my mind to all of you out there with different kinks and the way you view the world. I am so grateful for getting to know all of you. I am having a lot of fun and hope that my blog does that for you too.